Back To School Week Sucks, And So Do I

Things I believe you have to do to succeed at anything....

Quit Acting Spoiled & Coddling Yourself.
Be Honest With Yourself.
Quit Enabling Yourself By Making Excuses For Why You Can't.
Call Yourself On Your Own Bullshit (and boy am I FULL of Bullshit!)
And Get Out Of Your Own Damn Way!

This fits for any situation, not just for losing weight & getting healthy.

This first week back to school has been a doozy.  My kids are tired, and crabby, and fighting, and crying, and not listening.  My middle one has been completely out of control.  Not listening at all.  My oldest has had a super short fuse and wanting to just hang out alone.  My toddler is, well a toddler.  Last night I crawled in to bed, at my wits end after an entire week of stressing out & had a bawling meltdown.  To my sweet Hubby.  On his Birthday.  Yes, I suck, but I am on my period so I'll give myself a slight pass on the tears...  I feel like all I've done this week is discipline, yell, and worry.  I go from a concerned Mom "How will I help my Child?  Why is he acting like this?"  To an angry Mom "WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE THIS!?"  I have tried to be the understanding Mom, I swear I have, but after the 10,000th time I lose my shit.
So after a nice long blubbering, whining, prayer session, God hit me with some truth.  You see, God knows me super well.  I mean he should, since he created me. He knows that I don't take hints or subtle suggestions.  So after awhile of trying to be nice & send be subtle hints, he finally is like "Here my beautiful beloved dumb ass child.  Let me draw it for you in crayon."

#1.  These little boys are just coming off of a summer of Freedom.  Being able to Eat, Play, Rest, Speak, Go Potty or whatever their little hearts desire, whenever they want.  To having to sit in a seat & be told when and what to do nearly every minute for 8 hours straight.  Then they come home & I expect them to do everything they are told during this adjustment period?  Really Mandy!? If you tried to tell me what to do every second of every day, I would tell you Fuck Right Off.  But, I'm expecting my kids to do this without complaint.  OK, Good one Mandy.

#2.  They are having to get back on to a sleep schedule.  They are exhausted.

#3.  They are having a whole new, teacher, classroom, and expectations put on them.  They are trying their best at school to be good listeners & learners.  To be good friends & be kind.  To fit in.  New situations like this are a ton of stress for anyone.  They are stressed.

#4.  These little beings that are directly connected to my soul and feed off of my every emotion.  When I'm stressed & worried, it adds to their stress and worry.  When they see me angry & yelling, they get angry & yell.  When I feel out of control, it's makes their whole world out of control. My actions this week have only amplified everything they are going through in this big adjustment.

This morning is a new day.  This will be a day of Mommy apologizing for her mistakes this week.  This will be a day of I love you's.  Instead of repeatedly yelling empty threats, they will get a nicely spoken warning or two & then it will be directly to the corner or grounding or whatever. Yes, we will still discipline, because they still need to know that no matter how they are feeling at the moment, we still have to be accountable for our actions.

So here's to pulling my head out my ass and acting like the adult and the fucking parent,instead of an idiot.  To cutting my kids some slack when they are losing it, and praying they will extend the same grace to me when I do the same.  And to remembering my little list of life lessons....

Quit Acting Spoiled & Coddling Yourself.
Be Honest With Yourself.
Quit Enabling Yourself By Making Excuses For Why You Can't.
Call Yourself On Your Own Bullshit (and boy am I FULL of Bullshit!)
And Get Out Of Your Own Damn Way!

Blessings!
Mandy